25 Thing to do before you turn 25

Find the full article here.

25 Things To Do Before You Turn 25 | Thought Catalog

I stumbled upon (I was actually using stumble upon, see what I did there) this article the other day.  Seeing as I have 18 months until I'm 25, I thought I shall see what I would like to do/have done as well as the ones that I just don't understand. 

The original list....

1. Make peace with your parents. Whether you finally recognize that they actually have your best interests in mind or you forgive them for being flawed human beings, you can’t happily enter adulthood with that familial brand of resentment.

2. Kiss someone you think is out of your league; kiss models and med students and entrepreneurs with part-time lives in Dubai and don’t worry about if they’re going to call you afterward.

3. Minimize your passivity.

4. Work a service job to gain some understanding of how tipping works, how to keep your cool around assholes, how a few kind words can change someone’s day.

5. Recognize freedom as a 5:30 a.m. trip to the diner with a bunch of strangers you’ve just met.

6. Try not to beat yourself up over having obtained a ‘useless’ Bachelor’s Degree. Debt is hell, and things didn’t pan out quite like you expected, but you did get to go to college, and having a degree isn’t the worst thing in the world to have. We will figure this mess out, I think, probably; the point is you’re not worth less just because there hasn’t been an immediate pay off for going to school. Be patient, work with what you have, and remember that a lot of us are in this together.

7. If you’re employed in any capacity, open a savings account. You never know when you might be unemployed or in desperate need of getting away for a few days. Even $10 a week is $520 more a year than you would’ve had otherwise.

8. Make a habit of going outside, enjoying the light, relearning your friends, forgetting the internet.

9. Go on a 4-day, brunch-fueled bender.

10. Start a relationship with your crush by telling them that you want them. Directly. Like, look them in the face and say it to them. Say, I want you. I want to be with you.

11. Learn to say ‘no’ — to yourself. Don’t keep wearing high heels if you hate them; don’t keep smoking if you’re disgusted by the way you smell the morning after; stop wasting entire days on your couch if you’re going to complain about missing the sun.

12. Take time to revisit the places that made you who you are: the apartment you grew up in, your middle school, your hometown. These places may or may not be here forever; you definitely won’t be.

13. Find a hobby that makes being alone feel lovely and empowering and like something to look forward to.

14. Think you know yourself until you meet someone better than you.

15. Forget who you are, what your priorities are, and how a person should be.

16. Identify your fears and instead of letting them dictate your every move, find and talk to people who have overcome them. Don’t settle for experiencing .000002% of what the world has to offer because you’re afraid of getting on a plane.

17. Make a habit of cleaning up and letting go. Just because it fit at one point doesn’t mean you need to keep it forever — whether ‘it’ is your favorite pair of pants or your ex.

18. Stop hating yourself.

19. Go out and watch that movie, read that book, listen to that band you already lied about watching, reading, listening to.

20. Take advantage of health insurance while you have it.

21. Make a habit of telling people how you feel, whether it means writing a gushing fan-girl email to someone whose work you love or telling your boss why you deserve a raise.

22. Date someone who says, “I love you” first.

23. Leave the country under the premise of “finding yourself.” This will be unsuccessful. Places do not change people. Instead, do a lot of solo drinking, read a lot of books, have sex in dirty hostels, and come home when you start to miss it.

24. Suck it up and buy a Macbook Pro.

25. Quit that job that’s making you miserable, end the relationship that makes you act like a lunatic, lose the friend whose sole purpose in life is making you feel like you’re perpetually on the verge of vomiting. You’re young, you’re resilient, there are other jobs and relationships and friends if you’re patient and open.

Completed

1. We were never at war? Perhaps to truly say I have completed this one, we need to fight and make up? 

4. McDonalds and many other shitty service jobs, never again, never again.

6. A degree is what you make of it. 

7. Poor money management is something that drives me insane with the youth of today. 

11. My friend once told me I had a powerful, little dictator inside of me. Example - I bought phone credit once and accidentally threw the receipt out, I punished myself and went without phone credit for two weeks. 

17. I'm great at letting go! You have to do it like a band aid. Rip it off and let the fresh air sting the wound. The pain won't last long. (I did drag out my last break up for three months :/)

18. Haters gonna hate, I'm not a hater. Someone once told me I had the sunny disposition of someone who had been suicidal at some point. Compliment?

24. Done and done. But I don't miss home.

25. I think this one is very similar to 17.

To Do

3. Stand up for myself. IE Talk to my management about not having been paid. Nine weeks and counting...

8. I really like the Internet though. 

10. I think to do this one I will first need to find someone I am romantically interested in. Sigh.

 12. Thing are in the past for a reason, I'm not sure how I feel about that. California is really far away also. 

Not my cup of tea....

5. Is this talking about going to get food after a night out?

9. How is having brunch four day in a row a bender?

14. Is this telling you to lower yourself esteem? Think less of yourself?

15. I would think forgetting what your priorities would be a bad thing. Sure fire way to stray off your destined life plan. Perhaps that's the point?

19. Why would I lie about having seen a movie/read a book/ listened to a band? 

20. We have a good public health system in Australia

21. I don't want to write a fan girl email, ever. 

22. Does it matter who says in first? As long as you both love each other and the first time isn't via text message, on the other side of the world after you have been dating for eight months. (I'm looking at you Shane)

24. I will never be a slave to Apple. 

You know you're a back packer

You know you're a back packer when you.......

• Have been the smelly person on public transport.
• Have grown a beard and think it's totally acceptable
• Will take the bus for 24 hours if it means saving some money
• Know how to pack light and what benefits it will hold later. No paying for checked baggage, no dragging luggage up six flights of stairs.
• Have lived on nothing but bread for multiple days and don't think there is anything wrong with this diet.
• Are not scared of situations when your probably should be. Over night train through eastern Europe  alone  - not a problem
• Have lost a pair of shoes
• Have walked 2 km in the rain to avoid paying for public transport
• Have had someone cut your hair (or cut it yourself) with shoddy kitchen scissors
• Know things aren't shaped by what you saw or did, but how you felt and the experience as a collective
• Have travelled with someone and became subsequent best friends for a week
• Have had a great night out with people you met less than 24 hours ago
• Have ran for a bus/plane/train with a large back pack
• Have got so drunk you don't know how you made it back to your hostel
• Have gone multiple days without a shower. Twice a week is enough. 
  
• Have heard someone or been the person to have sex in a dorm with other people in it
• Have pilfered food from a free breakfast. (If you paid for breakfast you are allowed to pocket exactly double what you would have eaten for consumption at a later time.)
• Have worn clothes that were in the lost and found.
• Have missed a flight/plan/train
• Have attempted hitch hiking
• Guess people's nationality based on their luggage
• Only know what day it is if you have a flight
• Can scout out free WiFi in the most obscure places
• Know no permanent address
• Have owned and worn a pair of fisherman pants
• Have a strict budget, except when it comes to alcohol
• Know anything can be used as a towel
• Scarves are magic. (towel, sarong, headscarf, cover up, etc.)

                     Conservative head scarf                                            Make shift hand bag

Use one scarf million different ways.

Most of all it's the night you'll never remember, with the people you'll never forget. 

NB I'm not quoting Drake.

The occupants of households past

I was talking to an Irish girl in a hostel once, about room mates. I told her about the rag tag punch of misfits I've lived with in the past few years.
She thought it was great.
So here it goes again.



Morgan - Was a drug user, now a lesbian roller derby player

 I had just finished high school and was desperate to get out of my mothers house. Not being of legal age yet was proving to be a problem in procuring a home. I had worked with this girl named Morgan for about a month, she said she had a spare room. It was great at first, we got along well, we threw awesome themed parties, she let me use her ID. Then she started smoking a lot of pot, she lost her job, didn't get a new one and spent our rent money on weed.
Time in the house - 7 months

Adelle- The crazy Christian

I was desperate when I took the room in this house. I didn't know her, she was advertising online. I had just got back from an overseas trip and couldn't stand living with my mother any more. Adelle was (I presume still is) a strict Christian. She was engaged but didn't live with her fiancé. I have no problem with religion  to each his own, but she used to have her super judgmental bible study group come over every week. But the thing that really earned her place in the lunatic house mate hall of fame was the fact she kept a very large jar of chicken bones on the kitchen table. Something about good luck, wedding, I never really listened. It was gross. 

Time in the house - 8 months

Siobhan, Mark and someone else so forgettable I can't even remember his name.

This house was doomed from the start. I moved in with my friend, her boyfriend and his cousin. Can you pick the odd one out in that situation? It was ok a first, but I moved out after the boys put a dead crab in my bed. Probably  just a joke, but it was the icing on the cake.
Time in the house - 1.5 months

Marty and Ash. 
This house was really fun. I moved in here after having a pretty shitty break up. Ash is one of my best friends and he knew Marty through someone else. Marty was a social worker during the day and a drag queen who went by the name Martini Ice at night. This house was a debaucherous mess and great when you needed a costume for a party.
Time in the house - 7 months

The bat cave - dangerous to your mental health
All good thing must come to an end. With the previous house, Marty reached an age where he wanted to try living by himself so Ash and I moved on. Being poor students we took the first house we were offered with our poor credit history and limited income. We called it the bat cave, it was where dreams went to die. There was staples in the wall like they'd been filming porn in there, a hole in one of the bedrooms, an outside bathroom and no laundry. Oh, and the landlord was an insane devil woman who once woke me up by knocking on my bedroom window.
Time in the house - 9 months

Ash and myself find a friend; Bec the British bitch.
When we got jobs, we got out of the bat cave. We found a nice respectable house near the university. A girl I worked with moved in. It didn't end well. We signed a year long lease, she left after two weeks, she didn't give any notice and removed all her belonging while we were out getting hung over food one day. We got our pay back though.......
Then came Paul
A bipolar nutcase. He was a really nice guy, but he was six years older than us but acted six years younger. He made for some really great nights out, when he would blow his salary shouting us drinks.
Time in the house -12 months


Pip, Ashley Stacy , Jodie, Ray.
(My last home in Australia)

Ash and I went our separate ways. I moved into an all girl share house. There was Pip; the feisty flight attendant. Ashley; the lesbian professional dancer. And Stacey; the pathological liar with a dalmatian named Dexter.

Ashley got a cruise ship job and left, in moved Jodie. Jodie lost a lot of weight on the duramine diet and was paranoid about putting it back on. She didn't work, went to uni like two days a week, went to the gym twice a day and would try to force us into house weigh ins.

Stacey was convinced everyone was out to get her and moved out/got kicked out for not paying her rent.

In came Ray a girl who claimed to be a devout Christian but was super slutty as well. What ever makes you happy I guess.
Time in the house - 12 months

A Collection of short stories

This bus must be pretty old. At least 20 years old in fact. 

•  I saw a child pick up a cassette tape, put it in the CD player and shut the lid. He looked so confused when it wouldn't work. 
• Roller blading is kind of big where I live, I saw some chump trying to roller blade on pebblecrete. 
• There was a fire drill at the school I work at. They had pre-warned me that there going to be one and that I was responsible for getting my children outside to the safe point. Piece of cake. When the class started I did a quick head count so I knew how many kids to get outside. The alarm went off, I told the kids to leave everything where it was and head outside, there was no time to put their “outdoor” shoes on. Outside at the safety point did a head count, everyone there, nailed it! Or so I thought. I looked around at the other kids who were in perfect lines, my class swarming around like a heard of cattle. I saw one of my older kids on the other side of the car park, he waved to me, I waved back. As I was waving back a bee flew directly into my eye, I shrieked and tried to bat it away. I looked up hoping that the student hadn't seen it. He had and was rolling around on the floor laughing.  
  
  

• 

  The best example to give children, I think so. 

  This story was told to me and I think it's too hilarious not to share. A girl I was working with told me how when they were in high school she had to go on a really boring school camp, as soon as lights went out her and her friends sneaked out to go get drunk. She was pretty happy with herself so she was walking along smiling when she walked directly into a low slung clothes line. The clothes line went into her open smiling mouth and cut her in the corners of her mouth. 
  
  
• I thought I saw a man kidnapping a child, he was running towards me with what looked like a child under his arm. I was all ready to make a citizens arrest, but when he got closer I realised he was just running with a pink gym towel and a pair of running shoes in his hand.

• 

  Kangaroo print shirt

  I was out having drinks with some friends of my flat mates and one of their companions tried to tell me we had a different moon in Australia. I wasn't the only one who knew what he was saying was wrong, several people tried to explain it to him, it took about ten minutes before he realised.
  
  
  
  
  
  

 My working visa has been denied because my degree has not been apostilled. What the fuck is apostilled! It's just a way to scam more money out of people. This has set back the visa process back at least another two weeks. As of Monday I will be an illegal alien.

 

:-/

I read this article recently.

http://jamesrusselllingerfelt.wordpress.com/2013/04/25/date-a-boy-who-travels/

 I finished it with a coo, I thought what a lovely idea. It filled my heart with the hopes that someday I will find a like-minded soul mate and we will have grandiose adventures around the world, get married and name our children after all the special adventures we shared together.

But then the cynic fought it's way to the surface. In reality probably not going to happen to me and to majority of people and I can't help but find a few faults with this article.

Yes, it is a very well article about some of the wonderful super-mega-bonus features that comes with dating a traveller, but I think it may skim over some of the negative points. I was reading the comment section afterwards and a few other people seem to have the same idea as me.  Here are some points I think worth mentioning if you are going to date a traveller, some good, some bad:

• They will be ready to leave before you have even found your suitcase. If months on the road teach you anything, it is how to wake up, pack up and ship out in under half an hour, often with a raging hangover. (Good if you ever need to go on the run)
• Flighty – who is more flippant s than those who spend months on the road, picking up and leaving whenever the feel, changing their course on a whim. Great whilst travelling  does not transfer to well to the real world. 
• May not be able to stick things out, when the going get tough, the traveller jumps on the next train.
• Some people you meet will be on the road solely for the adventure and to experience the world, but other people who are running away, from what varies. But it can be hard to get commitment out of someone like this.  
• Be ready to wait for this person, but don't wait too long. It is a very fine line. I broke up with my last serious boyfriend because I wanted to back pack south east Asia for 3 months, he was happy to wait for me and that was the problem. He should have wanted to come with me, or at least be upset that I was leaving and hadn't invited him. 
• Selfish. When you have spent month making decisions only for yourself you can have trouble reintegrating back into society.  

In theory it is nice to think you will find someone that shares your enthusiasm for life and will travel to the forgotten corners of the globe with you. But, what do they say? Opposites attract? You can't bring two crazy travellers together and expect them to have wonderful adventures together, it will end in tears. You can travel with the one you love, but someone needs to be the more grounded person in the relationship and from personal experience I know it can't be me.  I'm not saying every traveller is like me, but this is based on myself and others I have met on the road. (I have met some great travelling couples and I am super happy for them, but they're the exception, not the rule)

I think the article will lead to an increase of desperate women trawling airport bars and travel sections of the book store looking for a 'chance' encounter with a world weary stranger, someone who can be their everything and open their eyes to a world beyond their scope, but if your eyes aren't already open, somebody else probably can't do it for you.

I think Seeker, Lover, Keeper had it right in the song “Even though I'm a woman” (awful title, I think it detracts from how good the song is)

Lines worth mentioning

"I'm in love with missing you more than I'm in love with you."

"I love the danger in distance."

"I love you more when I'm missing you, it's why I'm always away"

"I was born to be in a state of longing"

Song recommendation - Seeker, Lover, Keeper - Even though I'm a Woman

Pretty sure I am going to die alone, my shrivelled black heart will cease to beat.   

How NOT to win friends and influence people. (Based on real first time encounters with people)

1. “Lucky we're all British in here, I can't stand Americans. (I'm not British) “
2. “Who wants to make a bet the I'll be the loudest snorer tonight.“
3. Unidentified person: “What have you been doing?“
                            Me: “I was teaching in Georgia the country."
                             UI:  “Oh they started that war they lost against Russia a few years ago."  
4.  “I just throw it out there, I hate Chinese people and I hate Italians.“
5. “Where in America are you from?“ (never assume)
6. “I guess you're kind of pretty.“
7. I spelt my name phonetically for someone who didn't speak English as a first language. Someone I met the night before corrected me and spelt it correctly. The person I was originally talking to, then looked at me like a was a psycho.
8. Anyone who sits on the aisle seat on the bus/train, so nobody can sit next to them. Not based on a first time encounter, but I'm on the bus and watching somebody do it, so annoying. 

Not anymore...

The truth about long haul buses

It's so much cheaper and it only takes a little bit longer, this is going to be great, taking the bus is a great idea.

Wrong

Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong.

Buses operate with their own special kind of Murphy's law. Anything that can go wrong will go wrong and then some. Forget about sitting back, relaxing and enjoying the view. You will be driven to tears by someone you have never met and will never see again in your life, you will arrive in your destination feeling haggard and drawn, wishing you had just stayed home in bed curled up in the foetal position with a good book. It sounds more enjoyable then what you are about to put yourself through; if you decide to solider on through what will  be an obvious travesty, here are some simple rules, guidelines to prepare yourself for what you are about to embark on.

1. You will NEVER be comfortable. You've brought an inflatable neck pillow, you have worn layers to prepared for whatever temperature the bus decides to be, Ipod is charge, book at the ready. NO. This bus runs by it's own rules, the temperature will be scorching followed be an Arctic breeze that will blow through the bus every 20 minutes for the next eight hours. You WILL hit every pot hole possible, even when there isn't any, the driver will swerve off the road just to make it that little bit more uncomfortable.
2. There will be a douche in front of you, next to you and behind you. Any combination or all three at once. They will kick your chair at random intervals and often just as you have started to drift off to sleep, they will breath to loudly and even worse than that when you can feel them breathing on the back of your neck.
3. There will never be enough bathroom breaks. I won't drink any liquid in the hours leading up to the bus ride, nothing is worse than needing to use the loo on a long bus ride. But it's like your bladder knows you have settled in for the long run and decides this will be the perfect punishment for all the late night drinking sessions. You use the bathroom each time the bus stops but back on the bus and an hour in, you need to go again and looking around at all the sleeping passengers you know that it will be a while before you get your chance.
4. You won't time your snack eating well, and finish them way too early into the trip. You think you have enough to sustain yourself through out the trip, wrong. You're bored, so once you start you won't stop eating – leaving you hungry for the remaining hours of your trip.
5. You will encounter the jerks of public transport – they are on all and any forms of public transport: noisy cell phone douche, crying kids with parents who don't do anything, the sweaty slob, the smelly person, the general crazy who only wants to talk to you, and the drunk who will be on the verge of puking for the entire trip. Don't look for them, just know they are there, waiting for that seat next to you to become vacant so they can come and regale you with stories you don't care about. 
6. You will touch something gross: be it gum, a used tissue or just general filth. It's there and you will put your hand in it.
7. The seat you choose will be broken in some way. You spy a seat in the yonder, it looks too good to be true, no children around, plenty of leg room. But it won't be until your at least 15 minutes into the journey, that you realise it's broken: it won't recline, the tray table has snapped off, the cushion is wet with an unknown liquid, somehow it's not properly attached to the ground and you will go flying at every corner. (trust me, it's happened to me)
8. The traffic will only ever be bad if you are in a rush. This one is just a given.
9. You will never be prepared when it is your stop and everyone will look at yo like you are holding up the trip. You've known for the entire journey that your bus will arrive at the station at approximately 0700, you packed your belongings ready to go at 0650, but still when you pull into the station you are the last one off, struggling to put your jacket on and your luggage off without falling down the incredibly narrow stair case.
10. The music will be some sort of fusion between Chinese opera, hardcore drum and bass and Justin Beiber. It will be too loud, you can't drown it out and if you do manage to fall asleep you will here it in your dreams and wake up in a panic thinking all of your worst nightmares have come true.

NB: Buses with WIFI are fantastic.  

These boots [gum] were[n't] made for walking [down wet cobblestones].

Kala Castle

 The path to the Kala Castle is a very steep, narrow cobblestone path. The only shoes I have are gum boots, so when it started to rain I thought I'll be fine - these are all terrain shoes. Apparently not, as soon as there was a little bit of water between the soles of my shoes and the cobblestones it was as if there was large chunks of lard strapped to the bottom of my shoes.

I broke up the walk to the castle by visiting the ethnographic museum. There were signs everywhere saying no photos but the woman running the place must of liked the look of me because she said, "For you, photos ok." It was probably because I was the only person they had seen in a while. I didn't want to push my luck so I only took this one photo. The loom.

15C Loom

 I think looming has died out as an art form. Perhaps because the term looming as such sinister connotations, when someone looms you don't think of weaving together a beautiful rug. You think of a creepy 40 year old man in a black trench coat, creeping up behind you as you read a book in the dying afternoon sunlight.

Cannon guarding the entrance to the castle. 

When I first walked into the castle, I bought my ticket strolled through the archway. There was an older woman in a peach coat, I walked past her, she started to follow me. Being young I figured I would just walk a bit quicker surely she would soon lose interest in me. No. She chased me, she legitimately chased after me. I turned around and looked at her (I assume my face said "what are you doing you crazy old bat") she said nothing and just stuck out her hand. I think somebody should tell the beggars of the world that aggression doesn't work, you get much further with politeness and a pathetic look in your eyes.

SIDEBAR - When I was in Pristina waiting for the bus back to Skopje, I was enjoying a coffee with a young American fellow. A small beggar child came up to us. He was dressed like a very tiny gangster; wallet chain, sideways hat and all. He demanded money, not please, just "give me money." He must have felt us smirking at his attire, because he threatened to hit me. Come on kid, if I had even thought about giving you money I was most certainly not going to now. Your four foot tall you can't threaten me into giving you money.

After I walked up to the castle, I came back down crossed the river and walked right back up the mountains on the other side. This was not a gentle walk up the cobblestones, this was an actual trek. There was a path, which was overgrown and scattered with fallen trees. It wasn't bad and to get to the top was only about 20 minutes, there was supposed to be remnants of the old area of Illyria. There was very little left of the ruins. Only one wall. The trek was up there was worth it for the amazing view of the city.

The view of the city. 

There was an odd man walking around at the top of the mountain, he was wrapping the trees in multicoloured construction tape and carrying two unopened umbrellas on his arm.

I thought this sign was funny. "These trees were planted with the support of the EU." Is that it, that one lousy little tree that looks like the next big gust of wind would blow it over? There were a few more around but all pretty much in the same shape. Hopefully just because it is winter.

Osum river